19.

But not missing you is useless too. 

Undeniable empty space lying in my heart like a dead body lies feet under. Damned, I’m trying not to feel the gap you left the day I walked away.

Incoherence. I left. I miss you. Ah. I guess contradiction is part of the game.

However, despite this giant hole you shaped in my heart, if the power of turning back the clock was giving to me, I would do the same mistakes, without any doubt. I would go again through the moments of doubt, the several days or even several weeks of silence, the tears deaden in my pillow those nights you’d push me away, the accusing looks… I’ll take again the lunches at the restaurant, the dubious jokes, the raucous laughers, the days basking in the sun, the nights in your arms, the evenings we’d exert ourselves until the sun rises up, the serious high alcohol content talks. All of it… without any exception. The gaps make me grow up. At least, I think so.

Why do you not miss me, you?

I wipe the tears you left on my cheeks with the back of my hand. Probably crocodiles’ tears. You guys are good to play crocodiles.

I hate crocodiles.

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